Been so busy these past weeks I haven't written much. I'm sitting here at the new 3LD theater space three blocks south of the World Trade Center leeching the excellent wi-fi.
This entire show I've been woking on is just reonforcing my decision to really pick and choose my life in the theater world. Have spent the week dealing with problems I warned people against months ago, spending too much money on food in this neighborhood, handling attitudes, and falling behind in any sort of work that really matters too me.
It isn't all that horrible, but it isn't the way I see my life going.
I haven't had time for much of anything lately. I'm falling behind in a few of my accounts, which I can't allow to happen.
I'm compelled to write because I keep turning back around to this notion of Freedom that I've recently mentioned. It seems as I grow older my penchant for hermit-ism is growing, my tolerance for society as it is waning, and my willingness to invest the time and energy into changing society non-existant.
This never used to be the case and I'm not sure I like it. I used to want to change the world, now I just want the 'big fall' to happen quickly so we can get around to rebuilding. That is a horrible thing to say, but it's what is largely on my mind of late.
Perhaps I am just overworked. But to what end are we trying to hange anything, besides some ambiguous 'to make it better'? What exactly is the point of not just going off and living our own lives and enjoying the time we have?
This isn't fatalistic thoughts for myself, but for society. Where is the mass movement that says 'we're killing the planet an ourselves by not embracing sustainability'. This should be self evident. Its like fighting to convince someone to not shoot themselves in the foot? Wouldn't it be easie to le them shoot themselves in the foot and then bandage them once they've learned better?
Wow. That was a bad analogy.
Cheers!